Unfortunately, in these times, submission tends to have a negative connotation when in reality it really shouldn’t at all. Submission should really be a result of the husband being the spiritual head and leader of the family. It should never be demanded or expected by the husband but naturally fall in line with the husband taking over the duties of being the head of the family. If we as husbands show our willingness to listen to God’s call in our lives, our wives will listen too and follow us where we go.
The macho more insensitive husbands may tend to think that they are owed this submission because they are men and it comes with the territory and they’re too busy grooming their mustache… when in actual reality, it really comes from loving your wife with the utmost respect and praying for her constantly.
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. Ephesians 5:22-31
It has to be noted that husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the church and, well… that’s a lot of love. We are dreadfully incapable of that much love… but if it’s something we need to strive and pray for constantly, then I think that the everlasting ideals of a happy family life will be ever present.
As husbands we need show our children how much we love their mothers. We need to clean the kitchen, sweep the floor, hold them tight and tell them how much we love them in front of our children, watch Real Housewives of Toronto no matter how boring they are, etc. Most importantly, we need to pray with and for them. While the results might not be as instantaneous as we’d like I think one day you’ll wake up and realize how much things have changed.